MARRIAGE - CHILDREN - FINANCES

Everyone and anyone who has all three (Marriage, Children & Finances) realizes that they all have there challenges. You meet someone cool and enjoy being around them, you two love each other so much that the next natural step would be to get married:-) Marriage is awesome it's actually an extension of dating but now you legally get to play house:-) all fun. Next step if you are both on the same page is children - now I didn't say finances because it is ridiculous to wait and save for having children, you will see right away that you can never have enough money for children unless you are independently wealthy and even then children do not understand the value of money or the power it has, thats something they eventually learn from the parent. All children want is your love, time and attention, so please if possible don't wait (but also don't be stupid/selfish you need to have some form of legitimate income and I do not mean government assistance) because children are beautiful, fun and enhance your life in such a wonderful way it can not be explained, it must be experienced. So children come on board and it's all gravy and everything you both wanted........well not exactly. That page you both were on starts to tear. What happens is a major disconnect. When the babies start coming everything changes, along with the lack of experience and learning involved comes tiredness, not enough time, financial strains, misunderstandings and non-communication which can lead to other situations that negatively breakdown the foundation that was built up to this point. For the man - his wife is no longer desirable, shes always tired or cranky (bitchy), he feels neglected, forgotten and unappreciated. For the women - her husband does not help enough, he's non-sympathetic, does not look at her the way he use to, courting has ceased to exist, no more compliments, she feels neglected, lonely and unattractive. Now remember, everything up until this point is what they both wanted and love their offspring dearly, the children are not the problem and never will be. So I ask this of the community, what should be the next step for this couple? counseling? what if things have gotten to the point of disresptectful, embarrassing behavior, humiliating verbal exchanges or just plain co-existing under the same roof like roommates. Do they have a chance? is it better to just cut your loses and realize that you've grown apart in different directions and may want different things even though it hasn't been said? is it possible to fall out of love with someone so quickly? Biggest and most important question, do you stay together for the sake of the children? Waiting for your responses.
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#44- In Strangers’ Glances at Family, Tensions Lingerhttp://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/13/us/for-mixed-family-old-racial-tensions-remain-part-of-life.html?_r=1&src=me&ref=general

#43- 46 Percent of Mississippi Republicans Want Interracial Marriage Banned http://www.care2.com/causes/46-percent-of-mississippi-republicans-want-interracial-marriage-to-be-banned.html

#42- Jim Crow's "One Drop" rule may still apply to biracial children today http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/politics-raising-children/2011/feb/10/jim-crows-one-drop-rule-may-still-apply-biracial-c/

#41- Mixed Race Couples In South Signal Changing Attitudes http://newsone.com/nation/newsonestaff2/mixed-race-couples-in-south-signal-changing-attitudes

#40- Do Racist Attitudes Hinder Mothers of Mixed-Race Children? http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/04/100428121600.htm

#39- 'I love my mixed race baby - but why does she feel so alien?' http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-467787/I-love-mixed-race-baby--does-feel-alien.html

#38- Mixed Race, Pretty Face? Eurasians may possess genetic advantages that lead to greater health and enhanced beauty. http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200512/mixed-race-pretty-face

#37- I Don't Want To Be Black - YouTube Video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vqbHXqg6lB8&feature=related

#36- The Evolution of Racial Identity Among Asians. - Asian Americans of mixed racial ancestry have been referred to as multiracial, mixed-race, biracial, "Hapa" (a native Hawaiian term that originally meant half Hawaiian), and Amerasian, among others. http://www.asian-nation.org/multiracial.shtml

#35- Raising Biracial Children to Be Well Adjusted http://racerelations.about.com/od/raceconsciousparenting/a/RaisingBiracialChildrentoBeWellAdjusted.htm

#34- Multiracial Children - Facts For Families http://www.aacap.org/cs/root/facts_for_families/multiracial_children

#33- Census Data Presents Rise in Multiracial Population of Youths http://www.nytimes.com/2011/03/25/us/25race.html

#32- Black/White/Other: Helping Multiracial Kids Find Their Way http://www.edutopia.org/black-white-other

#31- Black? White? Asian? More Young Americans Choose All of the Above http://www.nytimes.com/2011/01/30/us/30mixed.html?pagewanted=all

#30- Mutliracial American http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multiracial_American

#29- Mixed-Race Celebrities on Race, in their Own Words http://healthland.time.com/2011/02/15/mixed-race-celebrities-in-their-own-words/
 

#28- Mixed Race America. Maurice Lim Miller literally personifies what it means to be a Mixed Race American. http://mixedraceamerica.blogspot.com/

#27- Mixed-Race Asians Find Pride as Hapas http://articles.latimes.com/2006/jun/11/local/me-hapas11

#26- Social Comparisons, Social Networks, and Racial Identity: The Case of Black-White From the Site: Mixed Race Studies http://www.mixedracestudies.org/wordpress/?p=8315

#25- Are mixed race people black?? http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/multicultural_families/53911-are-mixed-race-people-black/AllOnOnePage

#24- Walking Away From A Mixed Race Family? Susan Straight's novel Take One Candle Light A Room highlights race and the power of family. http://www.npr.org/2011/08/25/139943192/walking-away-from-a-mixed-race-family

#23- Writing about Mixed Race. - By jamie-m For one of my final papers in school, I studied several academic books and articles to write about the mixed race experience. here is my conclusion to the essay I wrote: http://mixedreader.com/2011/08/17/writing-about-mixed-race/

#22- Parenting Biracial Children: Issues for Black/White Biracial Child Rearing http://www.gibbsmagazine.com/Parenting%20Biracial%20Children.htm

#21- Racist Bullying in School http://racerelations.about.com/od/raceconsciousparenting/a/RacistBullyinginSchool.htm

#20- Teen Friendships and Racial Diversity http://parentingteens.about.com/cs/education/a/teenfriendship.htm

#19- Talking to Kids About Race http://racerelations.about.com/od/raceconsciousparenting/a/ChildRaceTalk.htm

#18- Using World Music To Introduce Children To Other Cultures http://toys.about.com/od/babydvdsandmusic/a/putumayokids.htm

#17- Children's Cliques http://childparenting.about.com/od/emotionaldevelopment/a/cliques.htm

#16- Parents Give Birth to Ebony and Ivory Twins http://abcnews.go.com/Health/twins-white-black-born-biracial-parents-stirs-issues/story?id=12984334

#15- Today’s Lady News: Biracial Girl Asked To Leave Classroom Because Of Her Hair Product http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-todays-lady-news-060810/

#14- Rush Limbaugh Compares Obama To Biracial Oreo Cookie http://newsone.com/nation/casey-gane-mccalla/rush-limbaugh-obama-obameo-cookie/

#13- Lauren London's Past Struggles With Biracial Identity http://www.bet.com/news/celebrities/2011/06/06/lauren-london-s-past-struggles-with-biracial-identity.html

#12- Race remains a focal point in university culture http://cw.ua.edu/2011/09/20/race-remains-a-focal-point-in-university-culture/

#11- The heavy price of mixed-race marriage http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-390812/The-heavy-price-mixed-race-marriage.html

#10- Facts on Interracial Marriages and Relationships http://www.lovenemotions.com/relationships/interracial-relationships-facts.php

#9- Do mixed race/cultures (interracial) marriages work? Would anyone of us go for such marriage/relationship? http://www.experienceproject.com/question-answer/Do-Mixed-Racecultures-(interracial)-Marriages-Work-Would-Anyone-Of-Us-Go-For-Such-Marriagerelationship/277096

#8- Black-white marriages on the rise http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/story/2011-09-19/interracial-marriages/50469776/1

#7- Does it do more harm than good to prepare kids for discrimination? http://loveisntenough.com/2008/01/25/does-it-do-more-harm-than-good-to-prepare-kids-for-discrimination/

#6- Interracial marriages at an all-time high, study says http://articles.cnn.com/2010-06-04/living/pew.interracial.marriage_1_interracial-marriages-millennial-generation-race-and-ethnicity-matter?_s=PM:LIVING

#5- Growth in Hawaii Hispanics, mixed race http://www.westhawaiitoday.com/sections/news/state-wire/census-growth-hawaii-hispanics-mixed-race.html

#4- Toronto- Interracial Marriage Explosion In Canada More Black, Arab, & South Asian Men Are Marrying Outside Of Their Race. http://gayblackcanadianman.com/2010/05/01/toronto-star-article-interracial-marriage-explosion-in-canada-more-black-arab-south-asian-men-are-marrying-outside-of-their-race/

#3- Mixed Race Gay Couple Faces Challenges And Triumphs From Within Family http://www.towleroad.com/2011/04/challenge.html  

#2- Statistics on US Families - What do American Families Look Like Today?http://groundspark.org/our-films-and-campaigns/thatfamily/taf_statistics 

#1- Mixed-race adoption and foster care: Fair rules? http://mixedandhappy.com/2011/02/20/mixed-race-adoption-and-foster-care-are-the-rules-fair/